(The Gift of Contentment)

Written by Abby Caymol | Nov 18, 2023

‭I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. –Philippians‬ ‭4:12‭-‬13‬ ‭NIV‬

If there’s one thing in this world we should never love, it is sin.

When I first met Jesus, I didn’t have a relationship with Him as much as I do now. One verse a day, all good! I even didn’t make time to open my Bible.

Contentment is one of the most prominent characteristics and lessons the Lord has taught me in everything that happened.

God used my status as a single mom to shape who I am now. I had only one job, and mostly, I would cry at the end of the day, thinking about how I would pay my babysitter the next day so that I could come to work. I have experienced, swallowed, and endured so many things just to meet our ends of the day. My daughter was a baby, so it was tough for me to work in the morning and take care of her during the night. Most of the time, I would come to work sleepless and tired.

I had to make sure all our bills and rent were paid, so I came up with an idea to help us survive financially. I would wake up early every day at 3:00 am to cook fried banana rolls. I sell it to my co-workers and friends to pay my babysitter and our bills. The extra money I earned for the day will only slip into the palm of my hands, and it will be gone at the end of the day.

I worked very hard during pregnancy and when my child was born because I didn’t have my family then. The people God sent me helped me a lot so my daughter and I would survive the day. All my friends, especially my ate Rose (older sister) and kuya Armand (older brother), who became my family, would give us a lot of food so I could save up for the next couple of weeks. They are generous to us even if I couldn’t give anything in return. To this day, God has blessed us to be surrounded by caring friends and people. I am truly blessed to be around such loving and supportive friends, then and now.

It hurts that I couldn’t afford to buy my favorite cheap bread then because of financial instability. I was mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted. Sometimes then, I’d think, I hate my situation—my life.

On top of that, the enemy would remind me that it was my fault I was a single mom. Fear overtook me that my daughter wouldn’t be loved enough because I couldn’t give her a complete family. The enemy would torment my mind that coming here to the United States of America did not make me successful but a failure. I thought about returning to my country with my family, But the realization hit hard. If I come home, my daughter and I might be a burden to my family, another hungry mouth to feed. I know that it was only me who thought that way. Our family loves us. Another reason I need to stay in the US is that the money I send to my family coming from my job is more extensive than what I gave to my mom when I was working in the country where I came from.

I was restless.

I remember the brokenness in my heart on a cold winter night with my baby in the stroller while waiting for a bus. I can count on my fingers that a couple of times, someone chased us. We were running, and I was paralyzed with fear of walking in the middle of the night. The other night, a dog chased us. I ran, pushing my baby in the stroller. Every night is like this. We were hurrying to walk home, not knowing what would happen next and what made it worse—the cold and rain.

Because of the stressors in our lives, I started to complain and hate everything that burdens our lives. What else could life throw to a single mom who sees everything as a failure?

My frustrations increased; complaints were much more evident, and hating life became a habit.

I forgot about God.

Whenever it rains, cold, and I can’t work overtime, it always breaks my heart to see my baby in the stroller while we walk in the rain. It also left a pinch in my heart whenever my friends drove along the street and saw us walking downhill, soaked under the pouring rain.

I never asked anything from God but only His protection whenever we were on the road. God used my season of dryness and insecurities when He put the desire in my heart to come to Him.

The best thing that happened in my life was when I had a relationship with Jesus. I learned that Christianity and everything about it would never complete you, neither would it save you, but only with Jesus alone will you find faithful redemption.

When the Lord placed a desire in my heart to follow Him, He thirsted me for everything about Him. My relationship with Jesus didn’t come instantly. Still, it was a long-term getting-to-know (not each other) your Creator, for God already knew who you are even before you are formed in your mother’s womb (Jeremiah 1:5).

I viewed my position as a single mom as a burden instead of a blessing.

When I began to know Jesus, all the hating and bitterness in life became dead.

Jesus planted a seed in my heart, and He called it acceptance. Soon, it sprouted. With time, this little sprout grew and became a flourishing tree loaded with fruits of contentment only because when Jesus started to plant a seed of acceptance in my heart, He fueled it with lovingkindness; as a result, I harvested joy from it.

Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance. –‭Romans‬ ‭5:3‬ ‭NIV‬

Along my journey walking with Jesus, I have started to embrace Christianity. The joy of knowing God made me come to Church regularly; I yearned to study Theology and joined a class. The delight and excitement in my heart have brought me to serve God.

As time went by, He made me understand my life’s purpose.

Because of this, I regarded gloomy days as clear skies. The rainy season is God’s favor, so that a new beginning will occur.

And finally, I have learned to love what I hate.

I may not be rich, but God provided for my needs as a single parent. I may not buy what I desire, but God put contentment in my heart. God made me realize that I should see things in life from a different perspective.

He taught me to be hopeful no matter how difficult my situation is, and foremost, to keep the joy of acceptance in my heart on the things I couldn’t control.

The Lord has blessed us with a car through Hope of the City Church, the previous Church we attended. First, I’m very grateful to God and the people in the Church who care for us. I will never forget the kindness they gave us. I no longer walk in the dark with my daughter in the stroller in the middle of the night in the pouring rain or on a snowy night, and I can now stay for work if they need me.

God also used me as a vessel to fulfill someone’s prayer. He put in my heart to use the car as part of my ministry to Jesus.

For God’s gifts and his call are irrevocable. –‭Romans‬ ‭11:29‬ ‭NIV‬

No one in this world is purposeless. Every single thing in this world serves its purpose. Even the very thing you hate in some areas of your life has a reason to achieve. You may not know why you must go through the deepest water, but God will unfold the answers in time.

When you learn to accept the things you can not control to be joyful in your contentment no matter your situation, God never forgets to give you the reward that you deserve. He never stops looking at you.

Always put in your mind and heart that Jesus, who sees you, is merciful, and the Lord is orchestrating a rescue plan for you even if you don’t see it now. The Holy Spirit will deliver you.

This poor man called, and the Lord heard him; he saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them. Taste and see that the Lord is good. –‭Psalms‬ ‭34:6‭-‬8‬a ‭NIV